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Showing posts with label spacelols. Show all posts
Showing posts with label spacelols. Show all posts

Wednesday, October 7, 2015

Impending Apocalypse Got You Down?

The World Is Ending......
Wait, what?! Again?
Not enough coffee for an afternoon of impending doom...
In case you haven't heard about this potential earth-destroying event, here is a USA Today article link to catch you up. In the past few years, we seemed to have survived several doomsdays. I was curious about how many times folks, well-meaning or not, have predicted the end of the world so I asked Siri and we found a List of Dates Predicted for Apocalyptic Events. Very interesting. Rather than fret, I decided to enjoy some memes and to make some more coffee.
Check out these #spaceLOLs :-)







Wednesday, April 22, 2015

SPACE JOKES, PUNS, and IMAGES

This post is a small collection (republished from my original Carsonia blog) of some favorite silly one-liner space puns and jokes found over time from all around the internetz! There are SO MANY - If you have a favorite not included here, let me know and I'll add it!
:-) ENJOY!
* Einstein developed a theory about space, and it was about time too.
* What is a light year? The same as a regular year, but with less calories
* How does the Solar System hold up its pants? With an asteroid belt
* What do you can an alien with three eyes? An aliiien :-)
* How does the man-in-the-Moon cut his hair? Eclipse it

* Why didn't the Sun go to college? Because he already had a million degrees!
* What kind of music do planets like? Neptunes!
* What does a space turkey say? "Hubble, Hubble"

* You hear about the chef on the space station? He's not much of an astronaut but his food is out of this world!
* A
 rise in mercury sometimes mars life on earth, how else would nature planet?
* He knew everything about constellations, some might say his knowledge of the night sky was astronomical.
* I thought about studying astronomy for university but I knew I would just be taking up space.


* NASA accepted the wildebeest’s application, and around our planet a brave gnu whirled.
* Those who study the moon are optimists. They look at the bright side.
* Two ladies were discussing the planetarium show they had just seen. One said the show was fantastic. The other agreed but added ‘Most of it was over my head.
*  When NASA puts 20 head of cattle into outer space, it will be the first herd shot around the world.

* How do you organize a space party? You PLANET.* Some people can tell what time it is by looking at the sun. But I have never been able to make out the numbers.
*Did you hear about the blonde that stayed up all night to see wherethe sun went?It finally dawned on her.

* What holds the moon up? Moonbeams. 
* Why is an astronaut like a football player? A: They both want touchdowns!
* How do you get a baby astronaut to sleep? You rocket
* What kinds of fish live in space? Starfish
* Scientists have found the center of Jupiter.......contains the letter i
* How many astronomers does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they like the dark
* How far can you see on a clear day? 92,955,807 miles (to the sun)
* Living on Earth may be expensive, but we do get a free trip around the sun every year!
* Where do astronauts keep their sandwiches? In a launch-box
* What did Mars say to Saturn? Give me a ring sometime!
* What kind of stars wear sunglasses? Movie stars
* What did the alien cook for lunch? Unidentified frying objects
* If a meteorite hits a planet, what do we call the ones that miss? Meteowrongs
* How do you organize a space party? You planet
* Why is the Moon bald? He has no 'air
* Why does the Moon go to the bank? To change his quarters
* Why wouldn't you want to give Saturn a bath? It would leave a ring around the tub
* What do you call a crazy spaceman? An astronaut
* Why didn't people like the restaurant on the Moon? Because there was no atmosphere
* Why did the cow go up in the spaceship? To see the Mooooooooooon
* How do you have communion in space if you don't have mass?
* Where does an astronaut park his car? At a parking meteor.
* What channel do asteroids like to watch? The comet-y channel
* How do we know Saturn's been married more than once? Just look at those rings!
* OMG They have discovered WATER ON MARS http://apod.nasa.gov/apod/ap050401.html
* When do astronauts have lunch? At launch time.
* I heard there's a new restaurant on the Moon, but it lacks atmosphere
* Why did the sun go to school? To get brighter
* What is a spaceman's favorite candy bar? A Mars bar
* What do planets like to read? Comet books
* How does a meteor shower? With Comet.
* What do they use when they run out of drinking cups in space? The Big Dipper
* What is the center of gravity? The letter v
* Are the Moon and the Earth good friends? Yep, they've been going around together for yrs
* What do astronauts put on their toast? Space jam
If athletes get athletes foot, then what do astronauts get? Missile toe.
* What hot drink do aliens enjoy? gravi-tea
* I'm reading a book about anti-gravity.....it's impossible to put down!
* How do astronauts add more protein to their diets? They make it meteor.
* I would go to space, but the cost is astronomical!
* One morning I got up around 5:00 a.m. and wondered  "Where did the sun go?"  and then it dawned on me.
* How can you tell when the Moon has had enough to eat? When it's full
* How do you ride a horse in space? Use a saddle-lite
* What kinds of plates do they use in outer space? Flying saucers
* What kinds of music do planets sing? Neptunes
* An astronaut wrote about flying to the moon twice. It was double-spaced.
* Cassini spacecraft took pictures of Saturn and Earth. It was the best of both worlds.
* When astronauts die, the local paper runs an orbituary.
* Two dating astronauts met up for a launch date.

* An astronaut broke the law of gravity and got a suspended sentence
An astronaut who fails on a weightlessness experiment must be aware of the gravity of the situation.
* Becoming a space pilot requires a good altitude
* Is that the Dog star? You can be Sirius!
* The satellite went into orbit on January 1st, causing a New Year's revolution
* Why is the Moon up so late these days? Don't worry, he's just going through a phase.
* Scientists allow us to see the sun in a different light
* Sitting in the sun can make you well-red

I'm sure I'll be adding to this list! :-)